Today

Today, I am missing my father- very much. There’s a huge space inside my heart where his presence used to be vibrant, resonant, and alive. Its still there, but its character has changed – faded into ghostly transparency. And today, that’s just not enough for me. Today, I won’t make the mistake of calling his cell number to see if someone else has it now. They don’t – and I can’t handle hearing his voice.

Today, I won’t be telling him about what my girls did. Or asking him for advice. Or making him laugh. Today, that makes me angry. Today, he won’t be popping over to my house asking me “What’s for dinner?” I wish I could hear him say that again.

Today, I am happy I had a Dad who could challenge me and make me think. A dad who loved me more than he ever said. But I know how much anyway- because he showed me.

Today, I am thankful my father WAS.  I love and miss you Daddy!  Today – and every day.

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8 thoughts on “Today

  1. Pingback: Through the Door: 6 Years Gone… | My Magnificent Mess

  2. Pingback: Through the Door: Weekly Writing Challenge | My Magnificent Mess

  3. I’m making a niche out of being all over the place – so do what works for you! You know this, but it always bears repeating:
    It’s doesn’t matter WHAT you’re writing. It matters THAT you’re writing. 🙂

    • True, and I made a commitment to write at least one thing for posting every day. Short, long or in between. plus pictures, if I can snag my good camera back from the oldest on occasion. lol

  4. This brought tears to my eyes. I am lucky enough that my Dad’s still with me – and even luckier that, after too many years of letting the differences get in the way, we finally have a real relationship.

    Thank you, so much, for sharing.

    • You’re welcome! I tried to read it to my husband after I posted it, but that didn’t work out so good….Thank you again for the encouragement to continue my writing journey. I don’t know if Ive found my niche yet Im kind of all over the place. But I’m having a ball with it. Love and Hugs!

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